california

Thanks COVID-19 pt. 3 (And Easter)

April 14, 2020by Becca Clarke1 Comment

(4/12/20) Typically this entry should go at the end but… A quick word about Easter.

It was an absolutely lovely day, despite having no sun or family around like normal Easter Sunday’s have been. I did lots of baking and cooking, listened to Handel’s Messiah in its entirety, and rewatched classics like The Notebook and Harry Potter. I was raised very religiously so this holiday has always been pretty significant. While I have not quite continued in that path I had a lovely, spiritual, day. It allowed me to think and be grateful for what I have as well as what I believe is at the core of the Easter and Passover Season:

This is a time of rebirth and change. It is a time where beauty, warmth, and new life arises after a dark period. Winter to Spring. I, and I’m sure many others, have been feeling this motivation to create a positive outcome out of the strange time of being forced to stay at home and away from others. It is a time where we have been given more time to think and do. I have heard many people exclaim (and have caught myself doing the same) that we will emerge from this quarantine with a new skill, more books read, goals accomplished, and fitter bodies. It just seemed a little ironic, and comforting that this holiday season happened amongst all this.

Anyways, it’s the little things. I may be pulling and stretching more and more to see the light in all this. But I’m glad I am.

Back to the normal, chronological, sequence of entries…

Read Thanks COVID-19

(4/1/20) The number of cases is growing. Parks are closing. More states are receiving orders to shelter in place. Politics are exploding. I’ve stopped checking the news as much. There is a new “normal.”

While there doesn’t seem to be a shift in the trajectory of this virus and how it’s spreading and how many are being affected, I have felt a shift in my own perspective today. I don’t know if it is because it is the start of a new month or even feeling the weather become warmer (which makes me happier in general.)

Today I suddenly felt like, “It’s going to be okay.” Time is still moving. The first couple of weeks of all of this it felt that time did stop. It felt as if all of a sudden the threat to my life and how I want to live it was bigger and more threatening. But the reality is, even before this pandemic and going forward after we start healing as a world from this, there was always a threat to life. and there will always be a chance of life suddenly changing, or even ending. You just don’t know.

It made me start thinking: when I wasn’t afraid of going to the grocery store or any sort of physical touch from anyone, how did I live? I just lived. Mind you, life was still hard and scary but for different reasons. This pandemic requires the same amount of strength that I have used against struggles against my mental health, the unknown and fears of my future, and even against other illnesses. Everyone has this strength in them, and I am starting to see it more and more. We all go through hard things and come out on top.

I anticipate that we will be in this strange state of a “paused life” for more time than was originally thought. But I also see a positive outcome. Don’t get me wrong, I am heartbroken for those who are sick, struggling financially, or have lost loved ones because of this. I don’t have much control over what I am capable of doing to aid some of that pain. I am staying home and use extreme precautions, and that is honestly one of the best things to do. I am trying to reach out more and more to friends and family. I am trying to create a positive and healthy place around me.

I am appalled when I see posts and pictures of my friends in other states and social distancing are not being done. I am terrified that my sister’s coworker claimed all of this is a hoax and is insisting on having parties and still coming to work. Meanwhile, she is sick and waiting to receive her test results back.

There is still fear. There will still be anger felt. But all we can do is do our best, stay at home, and live.

Read Thanks COVID-19 pt. 2

(4/10/20) Welp, it’s been a while…I haven’t felt super strong emotions, and fear, as I had been feeling at the beginning of the pandemic here in California, USA. There’s been a new normal that has been established, and a silver lining that I have found.

I am trying to become more in tune and in love with myself, my body, my dreams, and my reality. These things I have always tried to make a priority, but everything in life had seemed too busy. Kind of like a TV character standing in the middle of a busy intersection as cars, pedestrians, dogs, and bikers stream by. Moving so quickly that they are just streaks of colors, meanwhile the main subject is standing still.

But that silver lining that I mentioned before, is the time and the calmness at home to really enjoy those things. To really focus on me, but also really focus on those closest to me.

I mentioned it in the previous entry, but there is a new normal and even more so now. Because it is so, everything is not so scary. I know what I need to do to be safe and sane in all of this.

I wake up every day with the sun. No alarm. The earlier I fall asleep the night before the earlier I wake up, but it’s become later and later as I spend every late-night watching Netflix with my best friend over speakerphone, which I much prefer over early morning. Even Jasper is jiving with my new schedule and likes to cuddle and sleep in until 9 every morning.

I still make my bed, as it makes things feel put together and clean. I get into my workout clothes. Sometimes I eat breakfast first or I go out on a run, depending on the day. If it’s sunny, which it usually is except for this past week… I do some yoga in the backyard. The rest of my days are sprinkled with writing here, work, online window shopping, Instagram browsing, reading, practicing, Zoom calls, Snapchat, Podcasts, and lots of music. Some days I wear makeup. Sometimes I curl my hair. Every night I talk to someone on the phone, whether that be family or close friends. Not so much for them, but for my own selfish, lonely, feelings.

I like this slower pace but I am starting to miss the busy. But I truly think once all of this starts making a positive turn, life will not simply go back to the way it was. I think I will be less “busy,” but with more things that I enjoy. In this isolation period, I am missing things that I had previously felt “burnt out” of, such as serious music practice and classical music in general. I am feeling more motivated to “self-brand” myself and really do the things that I love, without shame. I feel an entrepreneur spirit. The little things are now bigger.

Overall, I feel more the effects of these “silver linings” and I am very much grateful for it. I am feeling guilt over my gratitude over this dire situation the entire world is in. So I am determined to keep being the best “me” I possibly can be to try and combat those feelings, as I feel very little control over the situation and my ability to add significant aid to others.

So I hope these little meager posts are helpful or simply a break to someone. I hope there is some beauty and silver linings in your life right now. We can do this, World. And what a beautiful place it’ll be.

Read Thanks COVID-19 pt. 2

Please please please share a comment! Follow the blog! I would love to follow back! This sharing thing is scary at times, but so worthwhile when I connect with others through it. Especially now. Anyways, lots of love and hope for health and safety to all of you.

Stayed tuned for a travel blog/vlog next!

Can’t wait? Read Thanks for the Memories Taiwan (Part 1)

Anyways…

Thanks for the Adventure, Corona (and Easter)

SOCIALS!

Instagram – I am constantly browsing, posting, and commenting here! (or at least it feels like it) Posting everything from blog, books, dogs, and music music music 🙂

Facebook – Blog updates and occasional Instagram content that’s too good, or simply makes me happy, to not share.

Goodreads – All things books! Full reviews are on there!

Bloglovin’ – I’m trying out this platform. You like it? Follow me! Show me why it’s worth investing in 🙂

Life, Uncategorized

Thanks COVID-19

March 16, 2020March 16, 2020by Becca Clarke2 Comments

I don’t know where I was going with this when I first started. I mostly needed a place to express my feelings and show others that they are not alone in their feelings. But I also wanted to share some positivity. Browsing social media, listening to podcasts, and talking to friends on the phone I am finding that majority of us are in the same place. Feeling the same feelings and having similar thoughts. We are just processing in our own ways. I really hope everyone is safe and healthy, as well as doing their part to fight this virus and protect those around them.

Today (3/12/20) was a big day for the United States concerning the Corona Virus, and with that brings lots of thoughts.

I have seen many post-apocalyptic movies and have read many books (such as The Giver by Lois Lowry and Anthem by Ayn Rand)…

(3/14/20) Obviously, I didn’t get all my thoughts down on paper at the moment and I’m glad I didn’t. I was full of anxiety, worry, and sadness over all of the uncertainty.

I live in Ventura County (neighboring county to Los Angeles county) and I am in LA 3-4 times a week for rehearsals and social things. Wednesday I thought we would all treat it like the “flu.” Thursday came around and I started to feel the panic myself and by evening the entire future for many people was shaken. Within one day events and rehearsals and jobs were canceled. I found myself needing to writing statements for the groups I sing in and for my online job concerning the virus. I started getting really scared and realizing that it is more than “just the flu.” I was tracking articles and browsing Facebook and getting frustrated and overwhelmed with the conflicting information, opinions, and lack of sympathy from people. It was a lot.

I want to express my thoughts in my safe little corner of the Internet because writing helps me process and feel better.

—The panic is real. While it seems a little uncalled for and extreme in some places of the country, it is ok to be worried for your family and others. That being said, it does not grant permission to be unkind and selfish. Take what you need (not more than you physically need), share with others, and connect with each other. What other time in our lifetimes has the entire world needed to ban together to support each other…oh wait we always should support each other.

—The judgment of others is not okay, and I am guilty of doing this recently myself. Someone may seem to be “over panicking.” You may see their precautions or statements online to quarantine and take the situation seriously as uncalled for because they are “young,” or “privileged” or “healthy.” The truth is you don’t know. They may be young but have a compromised immune system due to invisible chronic illness or necessary medications. They may be in daily contact with someone they care about who is compromised or in the “risk” age group. We shouldn’t have to worry about what others are thinking of us and we shouldn’t be using our energy in making those statements. And these opinions aren’t new, as accusations like this were made towards others concerning the common flu as well. Let’s respect each other.

—Check your sources. The media is a sticky place to tread through right now. Don’t rely on a shared tweet or graphic with numbers on it, but with no sources. Read the whole story/speech/statement before sharing it or using it to support your argument. Acknowledge all the information, not just the bits that make you feel justified.

(3/16/20) Now, this is turning into a journal of some sorts.

It is now day 2 of my self-quarantine/social distancing. Yesterday I finished one book and started another. I am treating today like any other day sans going out. It helps that it is raining. While it adds to the doomsday feel, it makes staying at home more cozy and justified.

Bars, Restaurants, gyms, etc. are closed in LA (except to fulfill take out orders). Still waiting on more test kits. Numbers are going to go up and I believe that it is going to get worse before it gets better.

The panic and anxiety are subsiding. I am feeling safer and a bit more motivated to take advantage of this time to better myself and my future. Whether that be mentally, physically or even financially. The first steps have to happen somewhere and some point, and sometimes over and over again. Now is the time that I am choosing to start. (Again.)

My heart is hurting for my freelancer and artist friends who are losing their chance to share their art because of the loss of gigs or students. I feel fortunate, despite losing gigs myself. But I am sure the inability to perform and rehearse will get to me eventually.

I am worried about friends and family who live far away from me. I am worried about my friends in Salt Lake City and my family throughout the country in Washington, Utah, Texas, and Virginia.

I deleted Facebook off my phone, and it has been a lifesaver. No more stress over the misinformed and opinionated and judgment filled posts. Instead, I check it once a day and only see my friends at the top of my feed, which makes me happy. I am also spending less time on my phone. I have kept Instagram and I love it. My feed is full of positive posts, more credited information, music, singing, and books. Lots of books. I feel more able to control what I am absorbing through that app.

A friend posted this on his story and I absolutely love and agree with it:

“Have Courage and be kind. You are not privy to the details of everyone’s situation. Their pre-existing conditions, finances, their loved ones who are already affected. We are better than this. Sensitivity costs you absolutely nothing.”

So shout out to Dayne for sharing that. That has been the one thing that has really disturbed me during the past couple of weeks. The complete lack of empathy and concern for others. It makes me anxious and sad to see.

Now is the time to acknowledge the art and beauty in our lives. Listen to your favorite music, discover some new music. Look at some art and read some poetry. Humans are incredible and it is interesting that people are turning to art and artists during this time. Whether that be through their TV, books, Spotify, etc. I am loving listening to podcasts and music. I am reading more and more. But I haven’t gotten into Netflix yet. For whatever reason, within the past year, I have not enjoyed watching TV. Although I am super excited about the free Metropolitan Opera broadcasts this week…

What a crazy, crazy, time.

Thanks for the adventure, Corona Virus.

Life, Uncategorized

Thanks Twenty-Nineteen

January 25, 2020January 25, 2020by Becca ClarkeLeave a Comment

We are a few weeks into a new DECADE! Crazy. Crazy. Crazy.

Even though I am late on the “New Years” trend, I want to acknowledge how good 2019 was despite all those hard, scary, and emotional moments. I want to acknowledge how much I have learned and changed for the good! I was talking with a friend and we started discussing our last year’s resolutions and goals. I completely surprised myself. While I wasn’t completely “successful” with those pesky annual resolutions (lose weight, make more money, yadadada), but every big thing or goal that I set I achieved! Really though, 2019 was oh so good. (Not like 2015. That seemed like a rough year for everyone. lol.)

Early January 2019 I officially made the decision to move from Utah to California. This was HUGE and spontaneous. Even though I said I had wanted to move to sunny CA ever since middle school, but actually doing it was very different. And very scary – financially and emotionally. I really had nothing to lose and much more to gain so I told myself to not renew my lease or go searching for reasons to stay and get ready…

It was HARD. So so hard. Lots of tears were shed, panic attacks endured, promises made and broken, goodbyes said…There were many reasons I wanted to stay…BUT I DID IT!!

I learned that change and growth are inevitable. Even if you try to stop it, it still happens. But I also learned that we humans have so much power in that we can manipulate the results (to a certain extent) to be a positive experience.

Closing chapters is difficult and there will always be things that you feel like you are leaving behind. Not everything (or everyone) can come with you.

But I did it 🙂

I made it a goal to find a job (or jobs…). And not just any job, but something I will enjoy and will push me towards a CAREER I want. Now I didn’t know what direction to go (and still don’t.) But I have explored. I’ve had the most jobs in the last six months than I have ever had…Now that sounds terrible from a professional standpoint. BUT…I found those jobs. I applied and applied and applied and managed to talk my way into some good learning and fun-filled experiences. I have also survived financially (barely) and I am proud of that.

I started a new church job – playing the piano for the choir and services at a local Methodist church. I have made connections and friends that I will probably keep for years. A door was opened into that area’s music world. And for me, every music opportunity is an opportunity for growth – as I am constantly doubting and hard on myself and my talents. Also, the church has a view of the ocean and I make sure to set aside some “beach time” every week – which is the most healing thing. The beach is my happy place.

I worked a temp job at a school photography company where I not only saw the behind-the-scenes of that kind of business but learned a lot about the local vibe from people who have lived here their whole life. I made some friends. I also quickly learned (like after the first day) that I do not enjoy desk jobs. I was only there 4 hours a day and I could barely make it through. It is not my vibe and I had to tell myself over and over again – it is OK.

I got a fully remote/online job and I love it. There is freedom and breathing room for me to do what I want and when. I feel the possibility of growth, change, and permission to set my own goals and defend my ideas within this particular business I’m working with.

I have learned I hate feeling stuck. I hate feeling tied and forced to stay somewhere because of strong commitments to something I really don’t care for (such as a mediocre job- that pays, kinda, but isn’t fulfilling.) I love feeling like I have the power to say yes or no to opportunities such as gigs or just fun vacations. I love feeling like I can make my day how I want it to be without a huge influence from a set-in-stone, every day, schedule. I love freedom.

I wanted to grow in music. I wanted to continue what I have been doing in the last decade and not become one of those who studied and dedicated their lives to something to only put money, success, and stability above it and completely change directions after school to only regret it later. Whew…

I have done so much music in 2019. Along the way, it felt like nothing. I felt like I wasn’t accomplishing much. That I was only doing the minimal amount, without much growth. I felt my failures. I self-analyzed and admittedly put myself down (as that is how I cope with trying to avoid disappointment…) But reflecting back…I sang with the Utah Symphony and Utah Opera. I auditioned and successfully joined Caroling, Top Shelf Vocal, Premiere and sang backups for artists like ROZEN. So many new things and new possibilities. I have met so many new people and new worlds/options have opened up. What a ride.

I do feel changed. A lot of personal changes (that I am not quite ready to share on the public internet haha) have occurred in the past year. The view that I have of myself has changed. How I see myself in the mirror and the future is constantly changing. I have discovered that while you may be on a path with people or forces pushing you along, ultimately it is your hard work and bravery to jump that makes it happen. I did it. I made those changes. Made the move. Went to the audition. yadadada. No one else. I am trying to embrace fear and feel like I am (somewhat/most of the time) succeeding. And I want to keep doing that in 2020.

2019 was my year of change – big and small – and I am oh so grateful for it.

Thanks for the Adventure Twenty Nineteen.

How to, Jasper, Life, Uncategorized

The Wicked Witch…Halloween 2019

November 20, 2019by Becca ClarkeLeave a Comment

It’s been almost a month…So I figured I would post about my HALLOWEEN! Even though it was simple and pretty non-exciting, I wanted to share my super cheap but fun costume!!

Most years I dread Halloween and vow to avoid participating, but almost always cave last minute. I come up with a costume, use it as an excuse to wear as much makeup as possible and typically have a lot of fun.

In plays, musicals, and operas I LOVE playing the ridiculous, kooky, old lady, villain. But let’s be real…planning for Halloween when you don’t have plans, money, and the holiday falls on a weekday all you want to do is hang out at home with a bowl of candy, your dog, and a watch party of one of Hocus Pocus. Or at least I do…

This year was different being my first year out of school – a major part of Halloween is the social “showing off” of the costume- living a new state/city with little to no money/motivation to party and life felt a little upside down with the recent Southern California fires. Work was canceled the day before, due to the fire, and was unknown whether my one source of social-Halloween celebration would happen. But…it did! And really it was too much fun not to put this costume together.

This year’s costume was easy, affordable, and fun!

The motivation came from my job – where the department I work in planned a group costume surrounding Disney’s Snow White. Within our cast, we had Snow White, the Evil Queen, all seven dwarves, and myself as the Wicked Witch! We trick-or-treated between departments, ate lunch together, and showed off our costumes. Jasper came with me, made lots of new friends (human and dog), and I even scared a couple of coworkers inadvertently. I spent the rest of the day with my “Hot Dog” named Jasper at home in my PJ’s and crazy hair and makeup. I watched movies, read one of my “spooky” books and treated candy to a whomping number of four trick-or-treaters. What a good and spooky day…

This costume was one small trip to Target, a search on Pinterest, one makeup practice, and about 40 minutes the day of. I probably spent a total of $20 on this costume.

Items I bought: a cape for $12.99 (you can see a variety of ones HERE), and two cans of white-colored Hairspray for $2.99 each. All purchased at Target!

Items I gathered: black clothes, an apple, and lots and lots of makeup

WICKED WITCH MAKEUP IN 7 EASY STEPS

BASE – I did my base foundation like I would every other day. Moisturizer-Primer-then foundation. I chose a lighter base color to seem more “aged” and to allow the contouring lines to POP
CONTOUR – Coutouring is EVERYTHING! I used a darker powder from what I normally use for the basic cheekbones, jawline, chin, and nose shaping.
AGE LINES – I used the Ben Nye creme based contour pot then multiple pictures on Pinterest and my own wrinkles as reference. I painted each line then would blend using a blender sponge then topping it off with some contour powder. For the harsher lines (around my eyes, eyebrows, and lips) I would also line (then blend) with the Ben Nye white creme base to add definition.
EYEBROWS – I had initially attempted to do the full-blown drag/glue down/and draw a new eyebrow look but absolutely failed. So instead I took the Ben Nye Black Creme base and drew the initial shape. I filled in the brows, added harsh hairs above and shadowed the hairs using the white.
EYES – I did a very basic eye look, using browns and nudes to emphasize my hooded eyes. I added a little mascara since my lashes are blonde and non-existent.
LIPS – I added some wrinkles around the lips and put on my favorite Red liquid lip. Hey, a witch has got to glamourous too. She is a queen after all…
FINAL STEP – I literally fiddled around adding harsher lines, contouring some more, and adding a “wart” on my nose using my drawing skills when I was done. Mostly just have fun and make it your own! You can be as glamorous or harsh as you want!

Thanks for the Adventure Halloween! (And Wicked Witch…)

Life, Uncategorized

What It’s Like to Move to LA (pt 1)

September 28, 2019by Becca ClarkeLeave a Comment

LIFE UPDATE!

It has been a full summer since I moved from Salt Lake City, UT, to the Los Angeles area. Lots has happened. Opportunities and disappointments have been abundant. Emotions have been felt ranging from utter sadness, conflicting “homesickness,” to joy, ultimate motivation and excitement. Overall this has been the best decision for me, and I feel that am in the right place.

***Disclaimer – take what you will, if you do, from my pieces of advice. These are things that I wished I believed just 3 months ago when I started this new adventure…***

So first for the most exciting parts of my new “LA life”…

MUSIC

In case you were not aware, I got my undergrad degree in music. Music is my passion and I hope to make it into a full, fledged, career. I am still figuring out how I will use my passions to support my life and how I can genuinely spend all of my time doing what I love. Whether that be through performing or other avenues of work within the music and entertainment world.

I jumped into auditions the first day I “lived” here. It was a whirlwind and I had no expectations going into it, which was probably the best way to do it. I most likely a post will come of some of my unique “Becca Moments” I’ve had at some of these auditions…

After lots of driving, and searching Facebook for audition notices…I am officially a member of the Christmas Matters Holiday Carolers! So get ready LA for Dicken’s-era dressed Becca to swoon you into the Christmas Spirit.

I have been dying to be back in an a cappella group again since graduating. I LOVE the genre, the people, the music, performing style, the challenge, basically everything about it. So again I jumped onto Facebook and Google and found a couple of groups auditioning…

I am officially a member of Top Shelf Vocal! This group is incredible and I feel so honored to be a part of it. I LOVE the people and feel like I am finding a place in LA with them. I am overwhelmed with the talent and I feel like I am learning by simply sitting in the room with them. The music is fun and there are some exciting projects planned… So good!

Not only did I audition for one a cappella group, but another one came across my radar… I am so excited to also be a member of Premiere A Cappella!! I have never been in an all female group and I’m STOKED. These ladies are incredible and sooo welcoming. They are helping me get out my shell and I love being around them. And of course singing with them. Again the music is fun and there are some cool opportunities coming….

banner-2 — Official Logos of Top Shelf Vocal and Premiere A cappella – please visit their websites and socials!!

I also jumped back into the religious scene to find a side gig… I have just started as the piano accompanist at a local Methodist church (which just so happens to be located a couple minutes from the beach…) I really am very excited about this opportunity. I really enjoy being involved in other religious services. The music director is phenomonal and really felt like I had found a mentor and friend within moments of meeting. I am excited to have a reason to practice my piano skills again, as well as learn new ones. There may also be more excuses to put together fun recitals and sing my classical rep again!

I am so grateful that these opportunities came about fairly quickly. I am also very proud of myself for putting myself out there and taking the plunge into so many scary auditions. I feel that this is just the beginning and I am so excited to do more music and meet more like-minded people here. LA really is an amazing city for music.

***Advice – it sounds cliché but…TAKE THE AUDITION! You just never know. Share your voice!***

JOB

The job search has been rough TBH… I had allotted myself one month originally as a “vacation” for myself – to allow a transition to happen as well as a chance to explore opportunities. I wanted to find a social group, figure out what field I wanted to explore jobs in, and figure out the lay of the land – AKA how far I was willing to commute. I wanted to explore my new city(ies) and feel that I belonged. And get all the nitty gritty stuff done like residency and such. But one month turned into three (without income) and it has been rough, but eye opening and I am very grateful for a supportive family and friends who are willing to take late night phone calls as I complain, cry, and obsessively talk about job applications.

***Advice – have multiple months worth of savings saved in your bank account. You deserve that time to become a human again after making a new change. Explore and become connected with your new surroundings. But save more than you think, no need to stress more.***

After multiple phone and in person job interviews…and companies “ghosting” said interviews I did snag a temp position at a local photography company. It’s small and part-time but I enjoy the people, the new skills, and the much needed money. I am still actively scanning Indeed.com, Google Jobs and LinkedIn as one does in this day in age.

I always heard the statement that, “Job hunting is a full time job.” I didn’t believe it, but now I do.

***Advice – it’s OK to spend hours on a computer finding a job.***

FRIENDS

This was one of the biggest things I was worried about. I thrive around people, but I can be painfully shy and get very overwhelmed in highly social situations. I hate small talk, but want to have conversations. Social anxiety is also a very real thing.

***Advice – give yourself some credit for trying! You did it! You went to the thing! You talked to the person! You put forth effort! Even if an immediate friend doesn’t result you tried.***

***Advice – it is also OK to stay at home, when you are overwhelmed by the drive or the energy or the unknown. You know your limits.***

I have been brave and have forced myself to go to small social events through religious groups, I joined a few Facebook groups that are based locally and are specific to my interests, and the music groups I am now a part of have been a huge lifesaver. My new music fam is the source of my feelings of feeling welcome and excitement to be here.

***Advice – it WILL happen naturally. Find the places and the things you want to invest your time in, and you will connect with like-minded people. And you will most likely have some fun while doing it.***

There have been very strong feelings of homesickness and missing my close friends in Utah. But technology and social media is amazing. I feel connected still, sometimes a little too much and needing to cut back on phone time…whoops… Phone calls are my jam! I love talking for hours, catching up, hearing their voice, and laughing.

There have also been some anxiety surrounding this – feeling worried I’m bothering people or worrying why they haven’t texted or called back or that I’m being forgotten. Normal millennial worries, right?

***Advice – don’t worry about how others are thinking about you or if they’ve forgotten you, etc. Don’t torture yourself, waiting to see if they will reach out first when you just want to say “Hi!” You are thoughtful, and it is okay to text first or to call. Just how you want to know that you are being thought of, they deserve to know that you’re thinking of them. Just don’t obsess, tear yourself down, and avoid your new friends in the process. True relationships will last.***

ADVENTURES

There has been some exploring, thanks to Utah friends visiting and family adventures. Some I’ve documented here such as in Thanks SD. I will, hopefully be updating more! I try to spend time at the beach, at least once a week and see a different sight or building in LA everytime I’m driving through. I’ve seen most of the “Hollywood” sights, been to a Dodger game, and experienced some of the best sunsets I have ever witnessed.

Every experience whether that be a rehearsal, job interview, a new book at the beach, party, restaurants – they are all new adventures. Everything is new!

Don’t get me wrong, I am exhausted. I have a day-to-day grind and it never stops. I’m up early in the morning to late at night. I drive (a lot). The driving and traffic here is insane but a way of life. Positively, I have found some new podcasts though… I don’t have many moments to myself, but more so than I had in Utah. I am motivated to practice my music, read more, run more, absorb the sun more, and be more.

What an Adventure.

Thanks for the Adventure, LA!

Socials!!

Top Shelf Vocal – Facebook and Instagram

Premiere A cappella – Facebook and Instagram

@thanksfortheadventureblog Facebook and Instagram

Personal Instagram !!

Please give a follow, like, comment! I’d love to talk with you! And go have an adventure!

Books, Bucketlist, Uncategorized

August in Books

September 8, 2019by Becca Clarke2 Comments

This past month was crazy with end of summer fun including family and friends visiting, exploring my new city, hustling to find a job, auditions, call backs, rehearsals and starting a new normal. I am completely overwhelmed and thrilled about it all, but it also meant that my brain did not allow blissful reading unless I was sitting on a beach not worried about time and to-do lists.

So my August in books…

I found a Free Book Library in my neighborhood! I saw these everywhere in the neighborhoods in Downtown SLC. I never participated and quickly regretted it later, but thankfully I found one in my new California street! My one read this month came from this cute, little, “take a book, leave a book” library.

THE MOZART CONSPIRACY (BEN HOPE #2) by Scott Mariani

I didn’t love, love, this book. I chose it simply from the title and the cover. Lolz. It was different than my normal reads: action, guns, and lots of alcohol. Very James Bond… But the mystery was exciting. Very Da Vinci Code… And I won’t lie that I was pulled in by the romance. It was a quick read, which once my brain shut off I couldn’t put it down. The excitement and writing made up for the “spy” genre that I don’t normally go for. And I loved the European and Opera references!

My book haul this past month came from a little shop in Pacific Beach, San Diego called PENNYWISE BOOKS. It was the quintessential used book store, complete with a man reading a book behind the counter and not even using a till or computer to take payment. They had a couple of shelves outside filled with books for $1. I HAD to indulge and bought IDAHO by Emily Ruskovich (which I am currently reading and loving) and THE GIRLS by Emma Cline. Why is it that browsing book shops and buying books sometimes more exciting than actually reading them?? Haha Read about my full adventure in San Diego HERE.

Overall, despite the lack of actually reading and contributing more to my Bucketlist Challenge, in was a good month in the book department.

You can keep up with what I am currently reading at my GOODREADS (come be my friend!) As well as on my personal Insta @beccaanneclarke (I tend to post on my stories when I start something new!)

Bucketlist count : 13/52

Other Socials:

Instagram – @thanksfortheadventureblog

Facebook

Thanks for the adventure, Books!!

Life, Travel, Uncategorized

First Travel Vid!

August 30, 2019August 30, 2019by Becca ClarkeLeave a Comment

So I love watching travel videos/vlogs. I also discovered after my first trip to Europe I loved looking back at the videos I took. There are so many sounds and more memories that come back from them. Although, pictures are also amazing moment captors.

Every trip I’ve taken since, I have filmed moments and I have always intended to compile each trip into one, watchable, video. So here’s the first! From my most recent adventure in San Diego!

Most of the video features our adventure at WONDERSPACES. I talk about my experience, that I LOVED in a previous post linked HERE.

Take a look! And make sure to follow my socials to keep up to date of my current adventures! Enjoy!!

Music Credit:

Adventures by A Himitsu https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCgFw… Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported— CC BY 3.0 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/b… Music released by Argofox https://youtu.be/8BXNwnxaVQE Music provided by Audio Library https://youtu.be/MkNeIUgNPQ8

Socials:

Facebook

Instagram

Personal Instagram (most of my travel adventures are posted here!!!)

Again, Thanks for the Adventure SD!

Life, Travel, Uncategorized

Thanks SD

August 20, 2019August 20, 2019by Becca Clarke3 Comments

This past weekend I got to escape my little life and hang out in San Diego with my sweet cousin, Lizzy! So here are some of the best moments from this past weekend…As well as places to see next time you go hangout in SD!

-The drive there and back. Yes, there was traffic. Did it take me 6 hours instead of 2 to get there? Yes. Was it worth it? Yes! That drive is gorgeous. Seeing the ocean and open fields with open water behind it brings me sooo much peace. My anxiety goes away and overall I am so grateful I moved here, simply because I am so close to the ocean. So I highly recommend taking the I-5 or even the PCH (if you don’t mind more traffic). Preferably timed around sunset going north, and you are guaranteed gorgeous views no matter what. Then add some good music and podcasts and you are set.

-The first night there we ventured to La Jolla to see some Utah friends and to check out Opera Neo’s production of La Callisto. It was so good! Entertaining, fantastic acting, costumes and sets. The singing was incredible and the orchestra was phenomenal. *Insert more adjectives* Mostly I was in heaven seeing two of my favorites singing their faces off. I saw one of my favorite professor, got my Mason hugs that I’ve missed, and Paul kisses as well as met a few other cool singers. Check out OPERA NEO for incredible singing and opera if you are in the La Jolla area!

Untitled design-25.png — The FANTASTIC singers, and my wonderful friends at Opera Neo!

-PACIFIC BEACH! My cousin lives right in the heart of it and she took me all around and boy I’m glad she did. So much beach and sun that I was in heaven. We spent most of the day walking down the main strip (Garnet Street), eating food and checking out the little shops. I filled my book haul need at PENNYWISE BOOKS, scoring some bestsellers for just a dollar each! The vibe in PB is just what you need if you’re looking for cool, beach town, vibes with a fun bar scene. I would say its a perfect spot for vacationing 20 something year olds but also very family friendly. The beach was gorgeous and the weather was perfect.

-We checked out WONDERSPACES -their “In Common” exhibition in downtown SD. So so so cool! Interactive art installations that involved light, sound, technology, fog, you name it. You wander at your own pace and there were employees every step of the way to explain the meanings. You could take pictures and interact with almost every piece. The theme of “In Common” was so prevalent and inspiring. I love anything that shows and reminds us that we are all human, experiencing this world at the same time. Therefore we do have the ability, and should, support and love each other no matter what. My favorites were the “Harmony of Spheres” by Foo/Skou simply because it was A cappella in an art piece and so much fun. “Confessions” by Candy Chang was incredible. In the most public spot of the entire space there were booths where you could anonymously write down a confession. They then would hang them all up for all to read. It was incredible to see how much we all have in common. So many confessions were about love, being in love, being heartbroken. Fear was common – fear to tell a close friend something or to make a change. There were funny ones, about peeing their pants or liking certain foods or TV shows. But all in all they were all human and relatable. Both the sad and joyous ones. I could’ve stood there for a hour reading each one.

-FOOD FOOD FOOD! One of the best parts of any trip, weekend getaway, or night out is the food. To simply not have to prepare anything and the little joy of not caring about money and simply ordering something because it sounds good brings so much joy. We had SUSHI KUCHI our first night. Affordable, typical, and delicious sushi in a super fun environment. My cousin told them that it was my birthday, while I was in the bathroom, simply so I could witness the incredible display of Birthday Celebration that they offer. The next morning I had a sweet, little, iced Chai Latte at BIRD ROCK COFFEE while waiting for our table at CRUSHED – which was well worth the 30 min wait. I ordered the Daddycakes which was essentially pancake tacos filled with eggs, meat, and jalepeno peppers. Just the right amount of food in a fun, weekend, brunch spot. We ate snacks and got drinks along the water in downtown, and lunch on Sunday at FIREHOUSE. It’s a cool, two-story, restaurant/bar right along the beach of PB. There are relaxed sitting areas and constant water views. We had delicious Calamari with aioli and I ordered a tuna melt sided with garlic fries that was delicious. And of course snacks such as sour patch straws and chocolate bars were consumed.

Untitled design-24 — Just a blurry photo featuring delicious food and a gorgeous cousin!

-We consumed said candy while watching “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood” where we laughed, cried and simply admired Leo and Brad then finished the night off by watching a Manson Family documentary. Luckily Lizzy and I share a fascination for the scary, sad, disturbing, and misunderstood topic of confusing people and moments in this world so we indulged.

Overall it was the perfect weekend full of laughs, sea air, humidity, girl talk, good food and just good moments. A weekend getaway is necessary and I will probably be making one every few weeks.

So…

Thanks for the Adventure San Diego!

P.S. More Pictures and Videos will be on Instagram @thanksfortheadventureblog !!

California Adventure, Life, Uncategorized

Thanks Rusty Screws

July 27, 2019by Becca ClarkeLeave a Comment

I’m gonna be honest. It has been a stressful week for me. Anxiety is real and sometimes I need time to be a potato, think about life or not think about life, and not punish myself for not accomplishing my long list of weekly goals (like an extensive post about Taiwan).

Someday I will write about my anxiety and such. It is a thing that many experience and I want this blog to be an open space. A space where I can share my stories and talk to others who have stories to share.

Today’s story is going to be part of a series that I want to call “Becca’s California Adventure…” *insert glowing letters and a echoing booming voice* Which will be a series of adventures I have while exploring life in Southern California.

If you do not know, I am a person who feels like she gets herself in strange and sometimes painfully funny situations. Whether they be self inflicted or just the universe gifting her more stories to tell . I feel that I am a character on a comedic sitcom. Just imagine Jess from New Girl and you’ve got it (or so I’m told.) I may share some older ones from my life pre-blog, but today will be one that happened just this week.

As part of the “things to do when you move” list, enduring the DMV is one that I wanted to check off as soon as possible. My goal was to take the written drivers test, receive a new license, and register my car – all in one go.

*WARNING* Government websites tend to give conflicting information. So after four hours and $300 lighter, I found myself with a new license but one signature and smog check short. Although they (the lovely DMV employees) did assure me that my next visit would be much shorter.

*WARNING* Government employees tend to give conflicting information. I showed up a few days later with more papers in hand and the idea that I would only be there for maybe an hour…

During DMV Round 1, I was told to come back and drive up to “Lane 1” where they would take the rest of my papers. I did not need to come inside…

I pulled up to “Lane 1” and sat there for about 10 min watching teenagers in the cars next to me practicing their hand turn signals and nervously watching the door waiting for the next test instructor to emerge. I rolled down the window and turned off my car. Another 10 minutes pass and I decide to go inside.

I wait in line to check in with the DMV Greeter, as I like to call them. He immediately hands me a number. I try to squeeze in an explanation of what I need. He tells me to wait for my number.

I will say though that majority of the DMV Greeters and Employees were generally pleasant.

I go out despite the number to sit in “Lane 1,” again watching anxious teenagers with their anxious parents. My car is turned off, I have the window down, and I read a good 20 pages of my book. Which I don’t mind in all reality. The DMV employee finally emerges after about 45 minutes of waiting, inspects my car, just gathering information that is on every other sheet of paper and she tells me to go inside.

I sit inside again reading my book for two hours. I watch the numbers climb slowly to mine. I hear a loud conversation that a woman has on speaker phone. I watch a teenager walk back and forth studying the drivers handbook. I reach the last 20 pages of my book as I get the text that my number is 15 min away. I start reading faster and faster, feeling the pressure of the clock. That anxiety kicks in. I finish the book I started in that very same room a few days before.

There is less than a hour before the DMV closes when my number is called. It’s the same man that was my “greeter” during Round 1. He looks through every piece of paper carefully as I explain the situation. He slowly takes out the staple. He starts typing on the computer. It truly felt like that scene from Zootopia. He asks for my license and hands me a heavy envelop with a screwdriver.

I walk outside as quickly as possible to replace my license plates with the beautiful, white, California plates. I go to the back and notice that the screws securing my Utah plate are a dark brown coloring. I hope for the best and start spinning the screwdriver. Dark dust begins to fall but it turns easily.

I move to the last screw and I try to spin. Using all of my strength as I had with the last one to get it to move. Instead it felt like butter. Every attempted spin would result in the screwdriver scooping out more metal, slowly changing the shape of the screw. Yet it wouldn’t move. I call my Dad in a panic, mostly just to vent and express how ridiculous I felt. I break off the plastic frame in hopes that I can unscrew it from behind the head of the screw. There is 20 minutes before the DMV closes… I feel sweaty, panicked and I can’t help at laughing at each stare I get from cars driving by.

I run inside with the rusty screw in hand. My Round 1 DMV greeter friend is working with someone else and I stand there awkwardly. He assumes I’m done and hands me my license back. “Do you have pliers? My plate is stuck…” and I hand him the first rusty screw. The lady he is helping, her eyes get wide and she says, “Oh noooo…” He doesn’t even look at me and pulls out pliers from his desk drawer.

I run back outside. Call my Dad again. Sweat is pouring off my face. The pliers simply peel off the outer layer of the screw, sprinkling more rust dust. I banter back and forth with Dad. There is one minute until the the DMV officially closes. I see the jolly police officer (if Santa was an officer he would this guy) start to close the door and I run. He simply smiles. I appreciate happy people.

I stand again awkwardly waiting for Round 1 DMV greeter friend. He looks at me and I simply shrug holding one Utah Plate, one California plate, one envelope, two screwdrivers, one pair of pliers, one rusty screw, and a stack of papers. The “Oh no” lady from before looks at me with empathetic eyes and a bit of a grin.

Round 2 DMV greeter appears and is asked to help me. He looked at my stack and sweaty face and simply said, “Go home honey. Do what you can to get it off.” He hands me my license and I leave. Grateful for happy, jolly, DMV employees who are willing to break policies for poor people such as myself who simply can’t function normally.

It is a few days later. I have since visited Ace Hardware, spent more time in a sunny parking lot, spoke with multiple kind people who probably just felt bad, and found my new car mechanic. I have one beat up Utah plate (which I will surrender to the DMV, don’t worry law abiders), two California plates properly attached with special screws that will not rust, and a story that seemed worthy enough to put on the blog.

I will also say I have gained an appreciation (again) for kind and jolly people. As well as an observation that at government facilities we are all in the same boat. We are all just people trying to accomplish what the government requires of us, without sacrificing our whole day and sanity.

So…

Thanks for the Adventure Rusty Screws. And Utah weather for causing said screws to rust. And California weather for simply adding to the comedy that was already happening.

Bucketlist, Uncategorized

Thanks for the Bucketlist #2

July 11, 2019by Becca Clarke6 Comments

Next Item on the list…

Item #2

To read 52 books in one year

It seems like a lot. Which it is. But I want something difficult, and almost unachievable. If I don’t make it, there is always next year. Now for an explanation. There is meaning behind every dream…

I LOVE reading. Always have. I don’t remember when reading clicked for me. I’ve always been able to recognize words. I remember sitting in my booster seat in the back of my parent’s red Saturn, driving down the street and seeing signs. I would challenge myself to see if I could recognize every word. I remember reading my book out loud to an older kid on my school bus and not recognizing the word “island.” But then feeling so proud of myself, knowing the word every time after. It fascinated me, words. Then stories. I would start a book and get engrossed in the stories and characters. The books I was choosing got longer and longer and the challenge to see how fast I could get through a book began. It was exciting.

I remember when “Chapter Books” became my biggest accomplishment. My favorites were the Junie B. Jones series and Magic Treehouse or the American Girl Doll book series. Then I started figuring out genres I enjoyed. Mostly Fiction, especially Historical Fiction, and of course Fantasy. (What kid in the early 2000s didn’t like Fantasy? Harry Potter ruled the world.) As I got older more genres were added to that list. Romance and Literary Classics were at the top. Now it is memoirs and Non-fiction with dashes of the original favorites.

My required reading assignments never were homework to me (even the papers in college). I would always read ahead and have to remind myself constantly to stop to answer the worksheets that went alongside. I would win awards for reading the most pages, or gaining the most “points” from the computerized book tests we took.

My favorite time in elementary school was when the teacher would read aloud to the class after lunch. I will always remember The Tale of Desperaux by Kate DiCamillo and sitting in my 4th Grade class with Mrs. Helvy.

In high school I spent two whole summers searching every discount book shelf for books on the AP Literature list. My Mom would carry the many pages of listed books in her purse. Then I read as many as I could to “get ahead.”

Books and stories saved me. Many times. They saved me from boredom. They saved me from feeling inadequate or not cool (surprisingly…) They gave me a way to connect to people, even adults, by being able to share common interests or a love for a classic children’s novel. They also saved me from loneliness.

When I was 13 my family made a sudden move from California to Utah. It was the middle of the school year with no warning. I remember the day we left our home in CA we stopped at a Barnes & Noble on the way to the expansive freeway. My Mom had promised to buy me a book, which was rare as libraries are a thing and books are expensive, as a reward for helping pack and not fighting too much against the move. I chose Twilight by Stephanie Meyer. Admittally I loved it. I read probably the first 100 pages on the drive, completely taken away from my current situation that I despised. The main character also was moving, in the middle of a school year, to a new place with no friends. There was not much more comparisons after that, but I loved the book. I loved the world. It also gave me something to talk about with other girls that I was meeting at my new school.

Summer came and I had found very little friends in my month and a half at my new Utah school. I had church acquaintances but no one I felt close enough to consistently make plans with outside of weekly youth activities. I was also the only girl my age…Boys were gross at 13. But I did find the library. Weekly, my Mom would drag us kids out of the house, or I would ride my bike in the 100 degree heat to the library. I would scour the YA section, usually picking random books from the “Newly Released” section based off of their covers. I loved long series because they would take longer to get through, and you got more time with the characters. I would usually check out 3-7 books at a time and drag them home in the plastic trash bag the librarian would stack them in.

That entire summer in my small, air-conditioned room with the radio on to the local pop station I sat on the navy blue, corduroy, pull-out couch that was placed under the front window. I read so many books that summer. I also listened to quite bit of Linkin Park and Katy Perry. But those books saved me for ultimately a very lonely 3 months.

Books and stories have saved me from anxiety. I feel those panicked feelings bubbling and I listen to the speeding thoughts going through my head. When I pick up a book and allow myself to dive in completely I feel calmer. I don’t feel like I’m wasting my time, as I do when I watch Netflix or browse Facebook. I am discovering a story, a world, and people.

In my opinion some of the most admirable people, specifically women, are authors. Jane Austen, the Bronte sisters, Louisa May Alcott, J.K. Rowling to name a few. They all challenged the world by creating stories. Not only are their books a joy to read and the characters important to me and so many others around the world, but their own personal lives are inspiring and relatable. Do you know anything about Louisa May Alcott’s life and her personal views? Rowling’s struggle to find herself? You should. It doesn’t matter when they lived, what genre of literature they wrote, or even why they decided to write. We are all human, and words are one of the best ways to share our personal humanity to others. Thankfully authors are brave enough to share those words.

Stories are the reason I was driven to performing. I like to think that books started that. The amount of individual stories are innumerable when looking at plays, musical theater pieces, operas, art songs, and song cycles. Themes cross over multiple genres and over centuries. As a performer, I can find myself in almost every character I have encountered. There is a thrill when discovering a story that is paired with incredible music, or some beautifully written dialogue. Then to share it using every skill set imaginable is a whirlwind.

Stories can show us that there is a way to survive and live. Through the good and bad. Our entire lives are compiled of our own individual stories. Which is why I think they are worth sharing. You never know who you can have a connection with. And somehow seeing moments in our lives especially difficult ones as stories they seem smaller, simpler, but significant.

After I finished college, dealing with mental health and a slew of changes in my life I could feel myself wanting to go back. To bring back a simplicity into my life. Books came back. They have allowed me to slow down. I have found the feelings of being engrossed in a world that is not the one that I am sitting in, which I have missed. There are moments where I feel as if I am the same girl who sat on that pull-our couch 10 years ago. I have the same insecurities and fear of being lonely.

I want to discover more books, stories, and authors. I want to finally read those novels that have been sitting on my bookshelf for years. I want to share these stories with you.

So here’s to the next item of my Bucketlist. I don’t think it will ever stop. I will always have some sort of reading goal. I technically started in May, but have procrastinated sharing because it is scary to share…

Join my challenge, see what books I am reading, and what I think of them at my Goodreads!

Thanks for the Adventure books!

Tag: california

Thanks COVID-19 pt. 3 (And Easter)

Thanks Twenty-Nineteen

The Wicked Witch…Halloween 2019

What It’s Like to Move to LA (pt 1)

August in Books

First Travel Vid!

Thanks SD

Thanks Rusty Screws

Thanks for the Bucketlist #2

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